Pigeon-Statue Conundrum

Words of wisdom tell us that we should accept this fact with open arms that some days we will be pigeons and rest of the  time statue. If  I were writing some self help blog , I would have eulogized these words of wisdom but I have never been a fan of self help blogs/books.With this kind of background, writing a self help piece would be too much an  asking from a fragile soul like me.

Wisdom is fine but just tell me who wants to be like this --->

Now that you know that wisdom is not going to find any place in this blog, let me tell you affront that I have a big issue buying this pigeon-statue story. Keeping wisdom aside and getting emotions forefront , no sane person would like to be statue. The  fact is Statue days hurts big time while the kind of sadistic pleasure you get in you pigeon avatar is the one you remember for quite a long time. I know people are not going to agree on this but little introspection will let you know that side of yours and would find that you are more comfortable in the bird's life. There might be a little percentage of saintly stoic population but I have never come across anyone like that till now.

This unbreakable bond of bird and statue is very often seen in office environment. Emotional  people take droppings(Bosses' bitter words) to heart while the other side of population just take it as their daily dose of vitamin. I doff my hat to this pachyderm "I do not care" class.

If you ask me,I belong to emotional/touchy category of people when it comes to statue avatar. However I enjoy my pigeon avatar thoroughly ;). What about you ?

Go Cold Turkey on Vices.. Really?

Everybody has one or other vices. I have read somewhere that  only way to get over your vices is to go Cold Turkey on them. It means leaving something abruptly. For example you can go Cold Turkey on facebook or may be coffee or may be smoking or eating sweets( my perpetual pain area).

With this principle I decided to go Cold Turkey on Sweets and guess what happened? The Turkey remained cold for few days and then it came out of oven smoldering! The vice was back with vengeance!

This Turkey thing did not work for me.  Does this way of giving up vices really work or gradual step by step approach is the way to go?I tried doing the gradual approach too by making a doable plan as I thought it  is most likely to work. Jotting down the plan and tracking it works because one can see where one is cheating. Based on this , I made my plan and I was fairly able to stick to this till the time few relatives from US of A arrived with a pack of Hershey's nuggets. Before I could realize half of the packet was empty. Of course that hand was mine only which was going into the packet and maneuvering the nuggets into my mouth!


Finally I have realized that for incorrigible people like me neither cold turkey works nor does any other approach. I fail to understand what secret approaches my super fit friends use. Paging all my super fit friends for answers !!

What is your SHU?

Acronym SHU stands for  Scoville's Heat Units. It is the measure of pungency of chillies. Just to let you know,  Bhoot Jolokia of Assam is one of the hottest chilies in the world. It's SHU value is so high(1,041,427)  that it is used in hand grenades by Indian Army. This piece of General Knowledge made it's way into my data bank today morning only through one of the FM channels of radio.

Now that I have got my new found knowledge and I am feeling enlightened, I think SHU is quite underutilized as a measure.Why can't human tongue(read opinions and voice) be measured on SHU . Well I know there are people who would be zero on Scoville's scale (just like Bell Pepper) as their talks are always saccharine laden ;). Personally I don't have much liking for this type.I myself have got quite an acerbic tongue and as you know birds of same feathers flock together so I need not explain my affinity explicitly. If only sharpness of tongue can be measured in SHU mine would be somewhere 10000. This is purely self assessment and value may vary with third party assessment ;).  Don't be boggled by huge number because I have taken  base unit as 1000.I am assuming that everyone has somewhat acerbic tongue. Fair assumption, Isn't it?

Based on these assumptions and limitations, took a shot at making  SHU table for our near dear ones , the table might look like this(Please note that the saccharine laden tongues are out of scope of this computation.)

Disclaimer: This table is work of pure fiction. Any resemblance to living or dead is purely coincidental 

There is an age old adage in Hindi  " तीर से निकला कमान और मुँह से निक्ला  वचन  वापिस नहीं आता" . The purport of this adage is that one should take care of acerbic tongue because once spoken can not be undone. That is quite true but that should not be over  interpreted. Giving respect to people is fine but as per my view we really need to get acerbic too if situation demands. Don't you know too much of sugar causes diabetes !

What do you say? Anyway how do you rate yourself on Scoville's scale ?